Jury Duty

I've only been summoned for jury duty once, and I was able to get out of it because I was on the opposite corner of the country for two years. Thank goodness. This time I was not so lucky and faced the tough decision of either going or having a warrant issued for my arrest. Tough call. I went.

8:07 AM - I arrive at the parking garage. Some girl on her phone feels the need to drive 2 mph all the way up to the 5th level. I'll save my comments on the driving of girls for some other time.

8:30 AM - I check in and wait. I start reading. Mr. Dickens and I are going to be very well acquainted by the end of the day.

9:17 AM - They start playing a movie in the jurors' assembly room. Now, I feel like there are four basic categories of movies: good movies, awful movies, movies that are pretty good and I'm willing to watch if I'm with a girl that wants to watch it but wouldn't watch otherwise, and movies that are so awful and so girly no girl could convince me to watch it with them. Never Been Kissed is definitely in that third category. I turn my headphones up and shut my eyes.

9:35 AM - The lady at the desk starts calling names. She counts off 30 people, and I'm not one of them. I exhale.

9:53 AM - Once again, names are being called to go upstairs. She calls 28... 29... 30! I'm safe. ....31.... 32.... 33.... Oh dear. ...46... 47... 48... This is getting suspensful... 61... 62............... "Ryan Moriarty, 63" BLAST!
64, 65. Period. So close....

10:15 AM - We line up outside the courtroom. You know, maybe this is good. How big is a jury? Twelve people? So 12 out of 65... I like those odds way better than 12 out of 30.

10:30 AM - We're seated. We're rolling. It's an aggravated assault case. Sounds kind of boring. But that's probably a good thing.

10:45 AM - The judge starts asking people if they would have any problem with their job if they're on the jury. Several people say they haven't been on vacation in many years. Now, I appreciate Judge Grant's desire to make the experience easier on us by cracking jokes, but do we really need a five minute discertation about the importance of going on vacation? Giving people court orders to schedule a vacation within the next three months is fine and all, but let's speed it up.

11:55 AM - We're breaking early for lunch. We'll reconvene at... 1:30?? What the heck am I going to do until then!? Are you kidding!? Who needs an hour and a half to eat lunch?!?

12:10 PM - I finish eating my overpriced calzone. You know what, it said it was a calzone, but it was really more of a stromboli. Calzones are more rolled-shaped, this was definitely folded.

12:27 PM - Is it 1:30 yet?

12:28 PM - Guess not.

12:38 PM - Where am I, anyway? Jefferson and 1st Ave? The ballpark is only a few blocks away, maybe I'll walk down there and back.

1:03 PM - Well, that was fun.

1:20 PM - I seriously haven't read this much in a long time.

1:30 PM - Finally. Dang.

2:14 PM - I don't like the way this is shaping up. A lot of these people have really good excuses or really biased opinions that are going to keep them off the jury. What excuse do I have? I'm bottom of the food chain at work, they couldn't care less if I'm gone for a day or a week, I've got disposable income out the ying-yang and won't miss the money too badly... I'm in trouble.

2:55 PM - We're going to take a 10 minute break.

3:05 PM - ...

3:15 PM - ......

3:30 PM - ...................................................................

3:40 PM - FINALLY the bailiff comes out to read a bunch of numbers that are excused.
Come onnnnnnn big money big money big money........ No. Twenty(ish) people are gone. My odds have increased to 12 out of 45.

4:23 PM - OK, now things get interesting for me. The defense attorney starts talking about burden of proof, and innocent until proven guilty, etc. Juror #10 starts talking about how she feels like the fact that we're all there, and the fact that the police felt the need to arrest him, means to her that the guy is probably guilty. As she's talking, I realized that, deep inside, I think I feel the same way.

I felt awful. I've been thinking lately about how judgmental I am, and this made it worse. Who am I to assume that this guy is guilty without hearing anything? People are falsely charged all the time! What's his side of the story? He's innocent until proven guilty, but for some reason I've got this little bug in me (or so said the defense attorney) that says he's got to be guilty until I decide he's innocent.

4:40 PM - I'm pretty mad at myself now. But I do feel that way, as bad of a person as that probably makes me. It's some consolation to me, though, that there's no way I'm getting on this jury. It's for the best. He deserves someone who won't prejudge him like I apparently did.

4:55 PM - Stop everything. Two people have to run out to catch a bus to Surprise. Meaning... I have to come back tomorrow at 10:30. There's a part of me that wishes that they would tell me just not to come because there's no way they're letting someone like me on the jury, but I feel bad enough about judging him to be guilty that I'll do it just to try to ease my conscience.

5:00 PM - Man, I'm already out here. I might as well go to the Diamondbacks' game.

9:17 PM - Diamondbacks win!
...
9:45 AM - As I'm about to back to the courthouse for day two, my dad tells me that they generally don't select engineering/programmer types because we think too much. I like the sound of that, but I already know I'm off the hook.

10:30 AM - Pick up where we left off.

11:40 AM - We're excused while the final jury is selected.

12:00 PM - Only 10 jurors are taken, and they're all below number 40. I guess they just chose the first 10 people on the list that passed the test, so I was pretty safe up at 63 anyway.

So I was excused. But not before being humbled.